Future and foreigners

"The future used to be such an abstract idea. The dream was enough, ... and now the future has the nerve to show up, and it’s expecting us to do something" - Kurt, on Glee

These days it feels like I'm buckling under stress about the future about as often as I was overwhelmed by homesickness in my first several months in Vietnam. Most of the time I feel like I have a good idea of what I want, but burrowing into the world of job searches brings me down when I can't find what I want or find it but don't feel qualified for it. Onward and upward, right?

Last night I spent another hour sucked into the drain that is the teacher's English club. As proposed by the administration, five students showed up to help the teachers. This happened to work out to one student per adult. I tried discussion again, using the discussion questions one of the teachers proposed (Why do people lie? Is it ok to tell white lies?), and it went about as (un)well as usual. Some of the teachers actually engaged with their student partners, but some just giggled or stayed silent the whole time, even when I encouraged them to talk to each other. Some teachers ignored their partner and chatted with another teacher instead. Given that there were only five adults, this left us with about two who actually discussed with their partners. Then, when I asked each pairing to share their opinions with the whole group, the adults wanted the students to talk for them. Clearly, the purpose of having student helpers/partners is not so the people for whom the club exists can eschew participating. Why do they even come? I felt bad for the students (and for myself), for whom it felt like a waste of time, but I consoled myself with the thought that at least they're getting some extra time to practice English and maybe even get to feel like a bit of an authority on English. Given that everyone has acknowledged that the club is a failure but refuses to cancel it or let me make any productive changes, I am resorting to the silent protest of ending the club early. Honestly, I'm pretty sure the teachers are perfectly happy to go home early, anyway.

After the English club I went out to dinner with Thy, Trúc, and Ngoc Mai. We had bun bo hue, my new favorite soup, and I discovered that there is a special night market already set up to accompany the upcoming coconut festival. Ben Tre's normal night market is just one block, but this one covers several blocks on several streets. We did some window shopping but didn't buy anything. It made me laugh inside when my students were shocked to realize that I could understand what the shopkeepers said.

I've been having wrist pain for over a week now. When it started I assumed I'd slept on my hand funny, but it didn't go away and yesterday I could barely move my hand, so I went to the doctor today. Trang was busy so another English teacher, one with significantly lower English skills, took me. Visiting the doctor was an experience. I pad four dollars for an x-ray... with no lead apron and with my teacher/translator in the same room. At first I thought that no one was even going to talk to me or look at my wrist, but I did end up seeing a doctor. He asked if I was Philippina. When he found out that I was an English teacher he asked if I would like to visit his house/teach his children. He prescribed anti-inflammatory medicine and, for some reason, heartburn medicine (proving to me that my compulsion to look research every medicine I am prescribed in Vietnam is well-founded). I had to pay $18 for this medicine! It may not sound like a lot, but compared to how much I have paid for medication here and how much I paid for the x-ray, it seems exorbitant. Later in the evening, I got this slightly confusing email from a concerned administrator:

Hi Adelina,
This afternoon your doctor what results, did not cut myself off, if you need I will use tomorrow's Chinese hot oil to remove the pain of you watch out?

Tonight I had the student English club, which was the complete opposite of the teacher English club. We started out with a discussion of the appeal and dangers of playing video games, and even though I knew that gaming and e-cafes are really popular, I didn't realize just to what degree. All of my students spend time playing computer games, whether it be 10 minutes a day or an hour a day. After about half an hour of discussion it was clear that they were itching to talk -- but not necessarily about the topic they'd selected, so I decided to do the conversation speed dating again. They loved it, and we decided to do half discussion, half conversation next week.

"Our subjest iso't cool but he fakes it anyway..."
Excellent shirt belonging to one of my students

On my way back to my room after the club meeting, I saw two foreigners on campus. Two! Foreigners! Near my age! It felt like a mirage. I walked up to one and found out that they're Australians and they're helping students learn choreography for the coconut festival. Why they're here doing that is unclear, but they'll be here for about two more weeks and we're going to try to meet up tomorrow. I'm still in disbelief.